Monday, November 26, 2012

February 2012 - Test-Driving: The Results

So how did it go?

To be honest, it was an attack on the senses like I've not experienced before…with a big bag of various emotions to boot…upsetting, jubilant, motivating, de-motivating, promising, encouraging, infuriating ….and so much more…

Initially there’s the euphoria of being able to see again, like a normal human being, seeing colours, details, (being able to do the dishes and know for sure that they are clean!!!)
I for instance spotted that after living there for almost a year that the wall of the landing in from of our Flat’s front door had a patterned relief on it… my ex, who had been living there just as long, hadn’t even noticed that… and her eyes were pretty perfect…

As previously mentioned, colours were so full-on and intense that I was convinced I’ve never seen properly in the first place.

Being able to see people’s faces was probably the biggest emotional thing to hit me… but even going to shops again without having to cower in the isles or just walk there without having to worry about tripping was such a relieve… and although I had just started coming out of a depression, which with ending a long relationship in the midst of it isn’t an easy thing to do, I can definitely credit my eyesight “returning” and experiencing all these positive things again to being able to "climb out" that bit sooner…

But… it wasn’t all good and great…
The pain and irritation on my eyes was no fun at all, but all for a good cause… I slowly build up from wearing them for 90 minutes to probably 3 hours the first week,( the second week I went to 6hrs…)
I slowly build it up… but easy? No… it wasn’t…

Another upsetting fact was realising (again) all the things taken away from you when your vision goes… 

Taking the contacts out after testing brought me back down quickly enough, having to stumble around the flat again, realising you really can't see shit without them…

But also realising that even with the lenses in there are still some things way out of focus, especially in the distance… one runner or cyclist approx. 50meters away from me, would look like 2, until they would suddenly merge into one whilst they would come closer…

Reading things up close was a problem, Bus timetables, Doctors Notes, News papers, I still needed to squint,

 “but everything else was great, so come on, feel good about it.. “ 

Yeah, but I need to read a lot in my job, a lot of computer screen, so what with that then?

In the end, of course the positives outweighed the negatives of course, but it’s all that Alone Time that just messes with your head way too much..

Of course, these were only the first test lenses… lets get a second set and see…

No comments: